Just Appetizers

I am the kind of person who likes details and facts. It makes me nervous when  I have to guess things, or fill in my own blanks (which I do often and get things wrong). 

Doing new projects, events, teaching a new topic or just simply driving to a new place can be stressing when you don’t have a clue, or not enough clues on the what, where or how!! 

To be honest I maybe a bit vain in this area, but I do like to have things together, or at least look like I do:) There have been many days where I had to get organize, figure out which way was up and simply try to get myself together. It would be nice to know what each day would bring so I could be ready, but knowing too much may tempt me not to get up at all.

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Being in a position where some one has all the details and I have none is awkward. The other day I purchased and new computer and had to have guidance in how to turn it on and get the minor functions of the computer going. I loved the computer, loved the newness and I love how I was going to get all this work done without any problems, but I did not love being ignorant! As I sat there looking for the icons to maneuver it was like being in school; I mean kindergarten and learning the basics. I knew it was important to listen and follow but a part of me wanted to jump ahead and just get down to the big things. 

Driving to a new place can make you feel anxious as well. Everyone has big trust their navigation whether it’s in the vehicle or phone, but we all have had those trips where the navigation messed up. Ever start the trip in a positive and confident place, navigation is flowing and then no service or there is a road added or closed no one told us about; now what? I don’t know about you but that not knowing unease begins to creep in. If someone is with me I try to stay calm cause I don’t need both of us in panic mode. I stare at the navigation, waiting for service/signal to return, or some redirection from that voice that has been leading me…help I am lost!! 

In one moment of not knowing we can experience so many emotions. Thoughts can flood our minds like broken pipe that we loose control of what is real and what is not. At the trigger of loosing it, we must remind ourself; this is not that major and get it together. Everything has a lesson, so begin to learn it and not miss what is happening.

I enjoy learning, love to be empowered, and look forward to new things.

The details of how, what, where and who, will always be a part of my journey when the unknown enters. Just sitting here writing this has me a bit giggly. It’s the place in life where you know you should not be anxious but you still are.

Today I had a new experience in a place I had never been with people I met for the first time. The moment before our meeting I was filled with mountains of insecurity and over thinking. I parked and felt great thinking I was at the right place and would be early, only to discover it was the wrong building and I had to walk to where my meeting would be. Instantly I felt disappointment try to invade my mind; you are going to be late, you will look unreliable….just felt out-of-place. With a determine attitude to be positive, I asked for help and was led in the right direction. The meeting went great!  

My lesson today was not to be so consumed with the details or the having to know; let go of that awkward feeling and enjoy the journey. I want to encourage you to stop rejecting your lessons to learn new things, even if it is about you:)